Archive for Humor

How To Shut Down a Workplace Bully with a Tic Tac

Sam Glenn is an Award Winning Motivational Speaker, Author and Performance Artist

(Please share this article if you believe in standing up against workplace bullies, egos and rudeness. You never know who may need some encouragement in this area.)

This may seem slightly humorous and I hope it makes you laugh, but the reality is there are workplace bullies who make life way more stressful than it should be and going to work incredibly miserable.

So, is it really possible to shut down a
workplace bully with only a Tic Tac?

Let’s just say, I am speaking from experience on this one. You don’t have to do this, but it will definitely give you something positive to think about or day dream about.

Understand, at some point, if a workplace bully doesn’t change their behavior or minimal effort is being taken to effectively deal with the situation, you are kind of forced to either lose your mind or get creative!

I say, “Get creative!”

Now imagine me switching into my infomercial voice….
Because it’s just more fun to share this technique in that voice.

Have you ever wanted a simple, yet effective way
to silence the office or workplace bully?

You know the person with high insecurities, a bloated sense of ego, always out for themselves, is often rude, sabotages other people’s success and believes speaking down to people is acceptable behavior. That person! The person who makes you fear Monday’s and pretty much every workday.

Do you know anyone like that?
Well, have I got an idea for you!

My training strategy only costs about $.99 cents —depending where you shop. There is no confrontation involved whatsoever, so don’t be afraid or nervous. In fact, there is fun built into this technique. All you need are breath mints and the ability to act a little bit.

Any breathe mints will do, but my personal preference are tic tacs because it draws attention when you shake them in the bottle and they are only 1 1/2 calories and come in many delicious flavors and colors. But, be careful, if the real J. Peterman catches you with them, you will be out on your can. (Can you guess what TV show that line is from??)

How it works:

The next time someone is being rude, disrespectful or talking down to you, follow these simple steps:

Step 1: Create a weird expression on your face and turn away like you smell something insanely horrible and toxic. If you want, for better dramatic effects, make your eyes roll back a little as if you may pass out or possibly faint. You don’t need to be perfect, but set aside some time to practice in front of a mirror.

This is called the distraction. It should be distressing enough that it gets their attention and they pause their bully ways and ask “Whats wrong or what’s your deal?”

Step 2: Hold your hand up in a gentle and non threatening way – like your asking someone to stop or step back. Almost a pushing someone away motion, but don’t physically do it. This indicates you are trying to escape or get away from something pungent and gross.

Step 3: Use this this script I created:

“I am so sorry, I want to hear all what your saying, but would you mind taking a breath mint or something…pleassse? Do you not smell that??”

Then offer them a Tic Tac and encourage them to keep the entire bottle as a gift. Let them know you insist. Then ask, “Would you mind if we took a short break or picked this up later? I really need to get some fresh air or I may get sick.”

Optional sayings to include :

You can add on to the above script by saying any of these creative lines (below)…but don’t go to far over the top or you could mess up the whole process and you don’t want that. These just make it funnier.

“Please, I may get sick if you don’t eat a mint soon – for real! Did you have ketchup and onions for breakfast? Did something happen to you on the way to work? Do you not smell that – the plants look sad. Seriously, is everything okay…that doesn’t smell normal? I would get that checked out. Has anybody else said anything to you or are they just hiding? Do you need to go home for a bit and lay down?”

At this point, you have interrupted their negative pattern. This pattern is a behavior known as being a bully. Halting this pattern is huge and your goal.

At this point, take a mental picture because the look on their face will be priceless. They will look embarrassed, worried and perhaps confused. They may want to go hide and curl up in ball. There is nothing wrong with that.

Scoreboard time:
Bully: 0
You: +1

You have now knocked them off their high horse without being mean or saying anything bad. You were creative. You deserve a pat on the back or a trip to Starbucks at least.

Repeat the process as many times as needed until a boundary has been created and the bully just tries to avoid you at all costs. A boundary is important because it prevents them from making your life more stressful.

If they pop a Tic Tac likes it’s no biggie and continue to be rude or bully you, pause again and say, “Oh no, that didn’t work. You gotta go do something. For real. Please!”

Sometimes it take a second round to make the bully go down.

The benefits to you, less stress and you will actually enjoy going to work, work harder, get more done and not live in fear of someone trying to mentally push you around daily. All thanks to a tiny Tic Tac and some creative thinking.

Remember, what you permit is what you promote.

Do not empower bullies or tolerate their shenanigans. If you don’t do something, they will continue to push you around, treat you poorly and make your life miserable. Being a bully and allowing it in the workplace is unacceptable. They need to learn there are consequences to their attitude and actions no matter what role or what level.

Something to keep in mind, If you don’t want to wait for karma,
go buy some Tic Tacs and have some fun!

 

Sam Glenn is an award winning motivational speaker who kicks off big meetings and conferences with energy, engagement and enthusiasm. For speaking inquiries and booking information: email us: contact@samglenn.com

My dentist went home and forgot I was still in his chair 

Sam Glenn, speaker, author
The lights flickered off, and I looked around with a mildly numb jaw.  I called out” hello??!!”
The receptionist sounded more surprised when she realized there was a customer still in the dental chair – me!
She came back and asked why I was still here.  I said, “well, I have a cavity and the dentist shot me full of numbing medicine and said he would be right back.  It’s been over an hour, will he be coming back soon?”
She looked horrified and said, “Umm, he went home for the night.”

Let’s stop the story and play, “What would you do?”

At that moment I discovered a fear greater than that of the sound of the drill – bad service.  I am not making this up, they literally forgot me, in the chair, with a numb mouth.I didn’t know what else to do so I got up, went home with a sore jaw and would never ever return.  But moving forward and having to look and pick out a dentist was a scary and some what awkward process. There is really no polite way to ask, “In a year how many patients do you forget about before leaving for the day?”I told my brother the story and he said, “You gotta go to my guy, he is awesome. ”

At this point, I am thinking all dentists are evil. The best business for a good dentist is word of mouth.  I acted on my brothers recommendation and it was a great experience.  I think I confused the dentist when I kept asking if he was going to leave me.

His staff was friendly.  They didn’t try to sell me on anything I don’t need.  Sometimes dentist’s do that. They show you an ugly picture of teeth gone bad and then tell you if you buy this mouth wash for $100 that your teeth will be happy forever.  When I ask the Dr. “What do you suggest?”

I am hoping his response geared towards my health and long term well being and not just an add on to the menu of options that will add more cash in his pocket.  I know the dentist has to make a living, but if you do things in a way that dissolves fear and builds trust, you should never have to worry about the money – it will follow.

The dentist that forgot me in the chair had one of the nicest offices I have ever seen.  They had state of the art equipment, which was really cool.  They worked with my insurance.  They had everything that would assume a successful practice, but they lacked one thing that can’t be bought – awareness.

Awareness is this:

1. Communicate you care.

Get to know your customers, ask questions, and focus on helping them achieve long term goals as well as solving short term concerns.

2.  Each patient or customer doesn’t have to be a one time patient/customer.

Focus on long term relationships, people talk.  A successful practice is built on happy patients who rave about their experience and not only come back, but tell their friends.

3. Build trust.

Don’t try to sell every possible thing you have in ever conversation you have with patient. Listen to the patient, give the best treatment possible, and then when appropriate make recommendations that will truly benefit the patient. People will come back to buy more if they trust you have their best interests at heart.

This doesn’t just apply to dentists, it applies to everyone in service positions. Be aware, communicate, build long term relationships, and build trust. When these three elements are in practice, everything else positive will quickly fall into place.

 

Sam Glenn is an award winning keynote speaker and is often the highest rated speaker at each conference he speaks at.  If you are looking for an uplifting speaker that your audiance will absolutely love and gain value from, then contact Sam Glenn’s office about booking him.  – Sam@samGlenn.com

10 Signs Your Co-Workers Can’t Stand You (A Humorous Perspective)

We face them every day, that co-worker with little quirks and an attitude that can be a big turn off or highly irritating.  But, have you ever thought if you might be that person?  Sometimes it is fun to take a humorous perspective on an annoying subject.  The following are humorous signs that co-workers can’t stand you.  Now, if you don’t find any of these funny, that may be a sign right there that we didn’t include.

Enjoy!

Here are the top 10 signs your co-workers can’t stand you.

1. They have removed all sharp objects from their desk for fear they will be tempted to hurt you.

2. Every time you talk someone groans in agony or rolls their eyes.

3. You are never invited to team lunches or any lunch for that matter.

4. No one asks how your weekend is.

5. You ask if anyone wants to hear a joke and everyone just pretends like they don’t hear you.

6. No one says good morning when you come in.

7. When you say good morning to your coworkers they say “It was up until you got here.”

8. The only suggestion in the suggestion box is everyone suggests you work from home-every day.

9. Everyone is early to meetings because, whoever gets to a meeting last has to sit next to you.

10. During a group conversation you ask, “Well can I share what I think?” And no one responds.

The morale of this blog is to be aware of how your attitude and actions affect others.  It is never too late to choose to be more of a team player by choosing a positive attitude and engaging in actions that make you likable to your coworkers.

 

This information is compiled, researched and written by Sam Glenn, The Attitude Guy. Sam is a sought-after leadership keynote motivational speaker by companies and organizations that want to re-charge attitudes for positive action. Sam Glenn offers strategies that combat stress and negativity in the workplace, and ideas that ramp up teamwork, communication, and the right culture where people will thrive. Sam Glenn’s Official Website: (www.SamGlenn.com)

I Wish a Donkey Would Kick Me

Have you ever wished upon a star that a donkey would kick you in the middle of a staff meeting to make it more interesting? That’s what one guy told me his meetings feel like with his department.  One person told me he thought about pulling the fire alarm so he could delay their staff meeting because they are a drudge to sit through. Sounds like college! 

When you have A.D.D. (Attention Deficit Disorder) like I do, you understand the importance of making meetings a little more captivating and interesting.  Even if you are not riddled with A.D.D., I bet you would like more spice to your meetings; am I right?

I want to share a secret to successful staff development meetings. Here is it. Are you ready?

Sam’s Secret to Avoid Boring Staff Meetings:

“SPICE IT UP!”

I think the insulting thing to a chef is when they serve a steak and you follow up with, “Do you have any ketchup?”

Take it from me, I am visiting companies all over the country and people are asking for ketchup like mad! It honestly doesn’t take much to give a staff development meeting a little extra flavor. By doing so, it shows you care.

In my 15 years of running my company, I don’t think there has been one meeting that hasn’t had the element of humor or inspiration. That’s a spicy meeting!  

Also, when you spice up a staff development meeting, it means you care about making information STICK. That is how you create retention, loyalty, lower turnover, and more engaged employees! 

If there was a National Association of How to Create Boring Meetings, I think their membership is overflowing.  Most managers don’t know it, but I get hundreds of emails a year from employees who say, “I wish my company would get you to come speak to us and spice things up.”

Why is that? It’s because something is bland, stale and going moldy in the meetings or the company. I am one of the leading experts in the nation on spicing up meetings and making them more interesting. Just ask anyone who has sat in my audience!  In fact, I just did a staff meeting at a BBQ house that smelled amazing!!  There were 40 employees who showed up for lunch, and they had me as a guest speaker. It was a grand slam of fun.  When the owner of the company drove me back to the airport, I praised him for making that kind of investment into his people.  He said, “Sam, you may not think it, but employees appreciate the little things.”

Yes they do!

It can be any kind of meeting, budget meeting – whatever!   If you are leading the show, make it a good one!  There are a ton of resources on-line that are budget friendly to spice up your meetings.

Here are my quick spices:

  1. Start off with a positive story.
  2. Share something funny.
  3. Surprise everyone with food or sweets.
  4. Ask for feedback and implement it to show you actually listened.
  5. Watch a motivational video.
  6. Buy everyone a quote book.
  7. Take the meeting outside.

I could go on and list 100 budget-friendly ideas on how to spice up a meeting. But, you have to determine what works best for you.  For me, my spice of choice is humor. Humor gets everyone to laugh and can lighten up the most tense of meetings. It works for me. But, you have to determine what works best for you. 

If your budget allows for it, get my award-winning videos. You can’t go wrong if you get those.  Hundreds of companies use them and I always know when they do because I get a flood of emails and Facebook posts – “Our company showed your videos at our meeting and they were awesome!” 

Yes, they are awesome, and I can say that because I created them with that sole purpose in mind. Trainers love to use them to spice up training, department heads love them for staff development, and companies use them as a spice to meetings.

So, define your spice.

What is your budget for your spice?

Implement your spice.

If people don’t take to it right away, that is okay. Don’t worry. Some people have gotten so stale in life and at work and so any sort of change will make them grumble. But who cares!  Spice up that meeting.

Making Meetings Fun

The other day, I jumped on Facebook to the tune of a fan telling me, “Sam we watched your videos in our meeting today, and we all laughed so hard!”  

I think she and everyone at the meeting had a little fun. It doesn’t have to be a video of Sam Glenn–ME–to get you laughing, but it doesn’t hurt. (lol) However, for years I have been telling organizations, managers, HR, and leaders that once in a while you need to have some fun in the workplace.

I once met a woman who became physically ill because the stress was so intense at work. She came home exhausted, was too tired to work out, cook a healthy meal, or function in a healthy way. The stress built up so much that it manifested itself in some negative ways for her.

We all have different work environments, but there are some things that are common. I think every workplace has that one negative downer who drains everyone. You know the type. The day you bring in donuts as nice gesture, that person barks off at you, “Real NICE! You bring in donuts on the day I am starting my diet!”

Is it wrong to add a little inspiration to your meetings, maybe to wrap them up? I mean, if you are in a leadership role, don’t you want your people to be charged with positive energy? I guess it boggles the mind when organizations say we can’t afford to have fun, or we don’t have time.  

My philosophy is that it should be a constant and never-ending quest to bring out the best version of your people. The moment you take fun out of a company is the moment you remove the substances that combat stress and negativity. Take fun away, and you take away passion, engagement, enthusiasm, loyalty, commitment and dedication. TRUST ME–I know my stuff. For 15 years, I have worked with hundreds of companies–small shops to  Fortune 500–and I am telling you, fun is not a luxury; it’s a necessity.

So, let me ask you about your organization. Do you have fun?

Is fun good to have in the workplace?

What ways do you have fun or lighten things up?

I think if you define fun in such a way that it makes people happier about life and the work they do, then that fun is living up to its calling.

On the flip side, I know companies that define fun in ways that can bring out the worst in people. Recently, I got wind of a company that is going to do something called the Drunk Olympics. They get on a bus, go to a retreat, and drink and drink and do activities drunk. Then they get back on the bus, get dropped off at their cars, and the rule is you have to be at work by 8 a.m. the next morning or you are fired.

REALLY?? Can I just say whoever came up with this concept of employee fun just might qualify for my idiot of the year. Yes, I said idiot. You may say, “Sam, I don’t like that word ‘idiot.’” 

To them I reply, “I don’t like people being idiots.” This is a concept that hurts. As I like to also say, “Stupid should hurt.”

It never hurts to consult professionals who know how to rejuvenate a company by incorporating fun in positive ways. I observed one company that purchased bikes, then divided people up and gave them a time limit to build the bike as a team. There were prizes and such and to top it off, the bikes were donated to youngsters who didn’t have or could not afford a bike.  

I suppose there are a lot of ways you can do it right–have fun and be productive at the same time. But the bottom line is, you gotta have some fun once in a while. I think it’s funny that people will actually choose to get paid less to work at a company that is known for having more fun.  Get the picture?

Fun is good!

We want your take on what makes meetings more fun? 

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